


solace

by s1lverwren



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Episode: s04e01 Mayhem, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, but not really it's only if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-16 02:27:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29943102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/s1lverwren/pseuds/s1lverwren
Summary: derek's declaration causes penelope to rethink things that she thought was were in stone.(set immediately after the "god-given solace" scene in s4ep1)
Relationships: Penelope Garcia/Derek Morgan
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	solace

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr saw it first.

“You’re my god-given solace.”

It was a loaded statement to say the least. It was a compliment, pretty words spilling out from a prettier mouth. It was comfort to her ears, a prompt for tears to spring to her eyes and a small smile to grow on her face.

But what did he mean?

It was hard for her to focus after he said it, her mind darting from possibility to possibility, trying to come up with any sort of meaning to the man’s words. And to take her mind away from what might have happened if he hadn’t jumped from that ambulance.

She didn’t know why she was so worked up over this. It wasn’t like they hadn’t thrown around declarations of love before- that was practically a daily occurrence. They were Derek and Penelope, for God’s sake! Flirting and words of confirmation were how they communicated. So what was so special about this one?

She couldn’t stop thinking about how desperate he sounded when he came back on the phone. There was a tone in his voice she had never heard from. There was need in his voice, desperation in his otherwise calm and sultry voice. She could almost make herself believe that in what Derek thought could have been his last moments, these were the words he wanted to go out on.

And that made her cry. She cried for Hotch, she cried for Kate Joyner, she cried for the victims. And she cried for her love. 

She’d accepted years ago that Derek Morgan would never love her back. The words they exchanged were just that to him- words.

But there was always that voice in the back of her head, nagging, nagging, nagging, telling her that maybe Morgan thought of her as more than a friend and a colleague. The voice pointed her towards soft smiles and stolen looks they shared. She was reminded of unspoken words they shared and moments they spent comforting each other.

Of course, it was mainly her being comforted. Derek was strong, oh so strong. But she liked to think that in the moments where it was just them, a blanket, and the basking glow of his old television, that maybe she comforted him just a little. Even hardballs like Derek needed happiness, and she knew that if anyone could ease that pain he tried so hard to hide, she could.

Why, she would ask that voice, would Morgan fall for her? Yes, she was hot, but so was every other woman in the world. What would make her so special?

“Penelope!” she berated under her breath, her own thoughts shocking her. “You are a smoking hot, confident woman, who doesn’t need to put herself down for any man! Not even ones that are practically perfect.”

“Absolutely correct, sweetness,” an all too familiar voice agreed. In her argument with herself, she missed the sound of footsteps approaching her and stumbled back in shock. Rough hands grabbed her shoulders, steadying her, and bright brown eyes stooped down to her eye level.

“You alright?” Those same eyes were glazed with concern, and if she peered past the beauty in them, she could make out her own open-mouthed appearance. 

Then sense rushed back to her, and she prodded a finger into a solid shoulder. “I should be asking the same thing to you! What the hell was that?”

Derek’s eyebrow raised, and he shot her a teasing smile, a smile that any other day would make her feel weak in her knees. “Babygirl, I have no idea what you’re babbling about.”

She crossed her arms and shifted her weight onto her right leg. Slowly and carefully, she surveyed his body, taking in the damage with a frown. He was worse for the wear. Soot, or maybe it was ash, was covering what clothes he was wearing that wasn’t tattered.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

She could hear the smile in his voice without looking, but there was something else there. Something that wasn’t just platonic love, something that made that little voice come screaming back, something that made her heart skip two beats.

“Why would I?” she cooed, slipping back into normal-Garcia mode with a smirk. “No need to take a picture when I can get it straight from the source.”

He laughed, a bright sound, filling her ears with memories of holidays, anniversaries, and a love that hadn’t happened. She thought about little angels, one boy and one girl being cradled in her arms, him standing over her shoulder every step of the way.

“Penelope,” he breathed, practically stealing hers straight from her chest.

She dropped her facade and gently reached a hand out, cradling his cheek. “Hi, my love.”

Leaning into her palm, he took a second to say anything. “You know…” he cleared his throat.

“I know.”

“No, it’s just… I meant what I said, you know that, right? You are an actual angel on earth, and I love you.”

Damn them, but the tears came rushing back. She let out a watery chuckle and leaned her head back to keep her mascara from running. “Yeah.”

“Do you?” he asked again, gently moving her chin so she was looking at him. Studious eyes stared into hers, and she finally believed that voice.

Her answer was turning away with a smile, cheeks burning hot, but that was nothing new. There was always something about Derek Morgan that made her feel like a giddy girl, experiencing love for the first time all over again. 

If she was his god-given solace, he was hers.


End file.
